Thursday, September 14, 2006

A Letter To My Vehicle

Dear 1991 Saab 900,

Now that I may lose you, I realize that I’ve loved you this whole time.

As soon as he saw you, my husband dubbed you “the dolphin”-probably because of your silver bluish color and weird slippery shape. Yes, I know “slippery” is an unusual way to describe a shape, but that’s the only word I can think of you odd looking sea creature car.

I hated you so much when those plastic handles broke off the front seats. Now when I want to let someone in the back, I have to wad up a paper towel or use a candy wrapper to pull the sharp metal lever, because it hurts my bare hands. Oh, how I cursed you over that, Saab 900, when I was without sufficient hand protector trash and needed to get into the back seat.

I was super pissed when I had to pay $100 in repairs before you would pass inspection. “Fuck you, stupid Saab,” I said. “I can’t wait until I can get a new car.”

Every time I tell someone they can’t buckle up in the front seat because your seat belt doesn’t work, I am shamed.

Every time I start you up and that ghetto welded muffler coughs and chugs and people turn to look at me with “whaaaa?” looks on their faces, I am humiliated a little.

But for all that? I love you. When I found out it may be more cost effective to get rid of you, my heart broke a little and I thought, little dolphin, we had some good times too.

Like that time when…*five minutes pass while I try to conjure up a good memory*…ok, well I can’t think of any right now, but I’m sure there were some pretty decent times. But my point is, it wasn’t all bad, and I feel like I’m about to dump someone who, while I wasn’t all that into them, they weren’t all bad either.

Now that you’re sitting in the shop needing $700 worth of repairs, I’m torn over what to do with you. $700 is a lot of money for an old car. But it’s also a lot less than car payments for the next six years. And even though you’re broken, you have been pretty dependable up until this point.

Oh Saab. We shall see.


Your driver

[that isn't me or anyone I know in the picture, I got it off Google images. But that is my EXACT car. Shit, for all I know that's the dude who sold it to my mechanic, where I bought it.]

After much discussion and pondering, I went ahead and told the mechanic to make the repairs. I decided the weight of a car payment just wasn't something I was willing to sit under right now. Let's hope the dolphin doesn't break down again any time soon.


At 8:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


I love you car!!!

And, no worries about the thread on my're so sweet. :)

At 6:52 PM, Anonymous Jenny said...

Isn't it funny how they worm your way into your heart in spite of the crap and pain they bring alon with them?

Wait...I've just described my husband.


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