Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Bittersweet

My husband went out of town this weekend, and as soon as his ride pulled out of the driveway, I ran to the arms of another man.

We spent the whole weekend together. It was beautiful. We laughed, played, cuddled and kissed. I held him in my arms as we fell asleep each night, and his infectious smile greeted me each morning.

Our activities were mundane; Blockbuster, the mall, the grocery store. On Friday night we met some friends for dinner, and on Saturday and Sunday nights we ate home cooked meals together. But everything we did was fun. No, not just fun-delightful. I was given the gift of having this amazing human being all to myself all weekend, and it was the sweetest thing I’d ever experienced.

Then, Sunday evening, the husband came home. My special weekend was over. Now there was someone else to share in his playing, cuddling, and kisses. And we all spent the day together Monday, and it was delightful in its own way.

But now I’m back at work, and I’m longing. I’m longing for more days of just me and him, and I’m remembering the way his chubby little fingers laced themselves around my hair when I held him, and it was just us, alone in the world, having fun, living life.

And it’s times like these that I regret the fact that I can’t be a stay at home parent. And it’s days like this where I go about in a melancholy haze, a cry waiting in the back of my throat to be released into a tissue when no one is around, because all I want is to spend every second of every day with my true love, my little boy, with his sweet cooing and “da da da”s, his huge toothless grin, and his precious little spirit.

2 Comments:

At 9:25 PM, Blogger Jenni said...

It sounds so amazing. I can't wait to experience that! There can be no comparison, I'm sure.

Congrats on having such a deserving Other Man!

 
At 4:39 PM, Blogger braiding mommy said...

I identify so well on this... rough times being a working parent.

 

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